More TV notes

Who needs Harry Hill's TV Burp. I'm much better and I'm loving these bullet points:

• On Celebrity Come Dine With Me Jimmy Osmond hired a midget as a butler. He called the midget Little Donny Osmond (his real name was Alan). Little Donny was dressed up as Elvis to announce the dessert selection. Bizarre probably doesn't do this justice.
• In the same show Caprice, who is morphing into Pete Burns, brought tuppaware to Jimmy's house so she could give the steak to her dogs. In no way is that insulting.
• My Career Is Going Down The Pan Get Me In There! starts a new series on Sunday. Page 3 Stunna Nicola McLean (below) has already confessed that as she's getting married soon she's only be interested in lesbian antics. She added that she didn't mind if Martina Navratilova wanted a fondle. The question is has Miss Navratilova's strap on made it in to camp or was it confiscated by Anton Deck?
  
• Apparently Nicola has also been whinging that she's only getting £7,500 for being on the show. Danni Behr, for reasons best known to the producers, is getting the top fee of £40,000. I'd assume Joe Swash is paying to be on the show.